I see you as a submissive because

So I hope that this doesn’t come off harsh but:

I see you as a submissive because you come to me asking to learn about how to be a Dominant, yet I can’t hear you talk. Still after 2 hours don’t know your name or your gender, when I asked you to direct someone, your eyes wander, your hands twitch at your sides constantly slapping your thighs, and your shoulders slump; you search around eagerly for the easiest thing for them to do. 

You choose it not because you want that thing, but because it is easy for the person that you are working with to achieve.  As they approach you with your chosen item you reach for it to lift it from them. Your eyes wont met mine, and you shift in your stance, murmuring your words. 

When asked to be in service your hands stop moving, your shoulders straighten, and you look me right in the eye.  You walk with confidence in what you are asked to do. Stand quietly when not being asked to do something and overall exude a happier more connected self. Your feet are spread shoulder length apart.  It is the first time I see relaxation and joy in you since we began.

You say that you are withdrawn and submissive around people but with crowds that you know you are gregarious and “Dominant”. I ask “do you get these crowd things to drink, make sure that they are comfortable?” You answer ‘yes’ because you think it is the right answer. I explain  that you aren’t being “Dominant”  you  are being in  service.,  You  get defensive. You say “No” .I says “OK’”

You say “So you are saying I am a submissive” and I say “NO I am saying that right now in this moment, submission is where you appear more comfortable.” You get angry. This isn’t what you wanted to hear. 

I ask you to re assume your Dominant position. Again you drop  your eyes, your voice,  your shoulders,  and I know that as soon  as I ask  you a question, I won’t be able  hear the answer. 

And I think “I WILL NOT make judgment on HOW you want to identify. But I can’t make you into something that you are not. This is such a waste of a good submissive.” 

So I smile and we continue.