When did BDSM become the catch all for stupid?

So maybe I am old, or missed it, or maybe it always was and I just had a blind eye. When did BDSM become the catch all for stupid? 

Recently I was online and on my feed where these really interesting pictures so I popped onto the profile to look. The first thing I saw was the woman having sex with a man that she identified as her 11^th unknown sexual partner for the day. I thought it was hot. I have no issue with that. Multiple unknown sexual partners can be very exciting. So at first I thought AWESOME!   

Then I read on to where she bragged about it all being bareback. I stopped and leaned back into my chair. Bareback? Really? Bareback? I understand that the use of protection can affect the feel of the fantasy- but so does Herpes, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis…. Her whole pussy just became a STD crock-pot that could not just infect her but everyone else that was fucking her as well.

(Side note here:  during the latent stage someone can have syphilis; be able to transmit it and be asymptomatic for anywhere between 5 and 20 years.) 

The next was a picture of her tied to a bed, some guy fucking her and the picture being taken as if through a barely open door.  This was explained as her being tied to the bed at a hotel and the door left open to whoever should come by. It was not specified as to where they were at an event or not. 

When the posters questioned the safety of this the poster (or their partner) remarked back that it was “her idea” and that “the other rooms had people in them and there was security patrolling the hotel”.  Then other posters came forward and said that “whenever they are in a hotel they leave the door open when they have sex…”

Do I really need to go in depth here?

When called on their actions- they simply said if they don’t like it get off her profile. That was their answer- get off their profile. When did this become BDSM? Blatantly dangerous vanilla nonconstual activity, that could lead to her death – had whoever passed by decided to close then lock and chain the door and then slit her throat, or was into asphyxiation but oops- went too far. All  of this being sought to have validity under the BDSM name.

Is this just me? Am I to much of an old fogey or prude? Am I missing something? To be clear I am not against sex with multiple strangers. I am all for it actually. I have had my fair share. 

I am against non protected sex with unknown people in any form. I am against blatantly unsafe practices and trying to make that OK by saying it is BDSM. 

Then  going on  to claim that they can do it because they are bad asses but the rest of us are just pussies because we dare to question the possibility that what they were doing was unsafe That this is all just jealousy because “we” don’t have the guts to  be as “real “ or “adventurous” as they are. 

 

Well in that aspect they are right-(except the jealous part) I will not tie my slave to a bed in a public building and leave the door open. I will not allow her to have unprotected sex with multiple strangers. I will not piss on the inability of vanilla (or even BDSM people for that matter) to consent just to get my jollies off. 

It angers me that people think this is BDSM and that this behavior is OK because it is put under the BDSM name. That those that don’t praise or exalt what they are doing are all just not daring enough, and because – Hey this is BDSM- people have no rights to criticize or ask a question about safety. 

 

This isn’t BDSM- this is Bullshit. 

And it needs to be called what it is- a Big Heaping Pile Of Bull Shit that potentially jeopardizes others physical health, safety, and welfare. The potential of harming another’s psychological safety, the potential of having those that both don’t understand and didn’t ask  to be a part of that game end up  in  the middle of that scene, and then  have to  deal  with  the aftermath, and the absolute disregard for consent. 

These people aren’t players- they are thrill seekers that set up others for harm. And Why? Because they can’t see past their own fantasies to own responsibility.

I can only hope that this is not where we as a community are headed. I can only hope that this is a minute minority of what this community is.

 Hopefully BDSM, although the catch all for stupid, does not allow itself to be the stupid, and this stays a variance from what the rest of the community is.