I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us" it is available for purchase here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html

Or on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Rest-Us-K-E-Enzweiler/dp/1329062213/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1432825657&sr=1-2&keywords=m%2Fs+for+the+rest+of+us

I am the founder of the Albuquerque Masters Group. We meet once every other month. The group is open to all who wish to explore their Mastery, slavery, or Dominance and submission. Please contact me here or at my email : Bigdykebear@yahoo.com for more information!
The meetings are free to all who wish to attend!

If you are interested in power munches, skills workshops or play parties in the Albuquerque area please contact the 20 year organization of AEL at:


If you are interested in active online community please find:


Group names for the Albuquerque Community Include:

Land Of Enchantment Fetlifers

Albuquerque Kinksters

KinkySpot Clubhouse

Albuquerque Master/slave forum

New Mexico Leather League: Leather/Kink/Fetish and More

Friday, January 2, 2015

What the Hell JUST Happened?

For me New Years Eve and  New Years Day are extremely important. There are omens during this time as to how my year will play itself out- or so I believe. 
So this year, like always, I did a little planning- not a lot- just a little. 
New Years Eve was going to be staying at home, sex and preparing for the New Years Day party. New Year’s Day was going to be an epic feast, family and play!  Needles and canes and bondage – OH MY! 

I put the bondage tables in the living room and they were ready to go. They are usually out and ready to go  but I really wanted to  play in front of a fire. I wanted to play to the smells and sounds and ambiance of it all. I had been looking forward to this for weeks!

The food included a turkey, two types of stuffing, collard greens, black eyes peas, mashed potatoes, and homemade berry cobbler. 

We had been saving for weeks!  

So  on New Year’s morning I woke up  and I was feeling OK- I little tight in  the chest- like I didn’t want to  take a deep  breath. I did  my morning  chores OK fed the horses and checked the trough, that sort of thing.

As the day progressed my breath got a little shorter- but I was DETERMINED!!!!

I received confirmations from those coming over that everything was a go and everyone was so excited-MAINLY ME!  

Over the last few days prior to this my slave hadn’t been feeling well. But she was holding her own, a bit of a cough, and fatigue, but overall good and excited for the holiday as well! 

We spent all day New Years Eve crafting together preparing gifts for the next day.
It was a group decision that we make New Years presents for each other, and I had been crafting until my shoulders were sore and my hands were numb!

So about 5pm or so it was time for sex!  Very important to have intimacy on New Year’s Eve. By this time my breathing had taken a turn for the worse, the cough  was more painful, I had vomited, and talking or laughing was becoming more difficult. 


Now just to preface this, earlier this week I had an incident that exacerbated my PTSD. All week I had been struggling with being present in my body.  So having sex was more than just about it being on New Years Eve it was about reclaiming my body.    
When  we started I was struggling to  breathe  a little more, my body wasn’t cooperating, and then  right as we were getting into foreplay- you  guessed it- sick  people poops. 


I made my way back to bed and gave it my all.

I would struggle to breathe, then I would just lie there, panting and snotting- and then-   I burped. 

Yep-  it was at that point we stopped sex,  but we couldn’t stop  laughing. 

It just got funnier and funnier!  We decided to  cuddle and to  fulfill  my wish for sex it was decided that  “ON 3”  we would “cum”  together. 

It was all so hilarious the flat monotone voice of “oh yes stick it in  daddy…” “Yes more and deep like….” As the faked orgasms rang in my ears I lost it! I could not stop laughing, I couldn’t breathe, it was UNBELIEVABLY hysterical.

Then I coughed and farted. At the same time.

So we laid there laughing and holding each other. It was so intimate, so beautiful, and so  loving. 

It was about two hours later when I knew I was in real trouble. So we bundled up and headed to the Women’s ER. They were so  good to  me, I was in  and out really fast and I am  now on  several  meds to  get my viral  upper respiratory inflection  under control.

We were headed home  when  my slave started to  not do  well. she had been  struggling but she had put herself on  the back  burner to  care for me. After I received treatment she started to drop. Bad and hard.

I helped her into the house, got her changed and on the couch.  It was at that point that I knew that there was no way tomorrow would happen. My meds were making me shaky and weak; her meds give her bad headaches and fatigue. talking triggered harsh  painful  coughing fits. 
So I sent out the alert that tomorrow was not going to happen.  I felt so bad about cancelling- everyone needed this- but as we sat on the couch puffing away it became painfully apparent that there was no way we were going to  be functional.

When midnight came she was on a breathing treatment as I tried to not cough. 

About one am we got up slowly and made the bed together. We looked at each other, held hands and said to each other “as a team.”

When  we got up on  New Year’s Day we weren’t a whole lot better- but there was a turkey to  cook- so  I had my slave sit and talk  me through  how to cook  a turkey.

My first turkey. Ever.

I did all of the prep work as we slowly made it through our day.  Together as a team.

Resting when we needed to, each one of us taking over the next part as the other ran out of steam.

Together as a team. We would say it to give each other strength, to support and love each other as we couldn’t talk a lot before the coughing would be triggered in both of us.

So  that was our holiday.  The bondage tables are left unused, my needle pack unopened and the canes undisturbed. The fire left unlit because we couldn't take any irritation that would possibly cause a cough.
The food was slowly cooked over the day in parts with most of it packed away for later.

Everyone was very understanding. 

Even thought I am  not sure what all  happened here- time went so  unbelievably fast. Before we know it there was midnight and the first day of the new year was drawing to  a close. It all  happened on  hyper speed.

What I can say is Happy New Year to everyone.

And may your dreams, desires, and loves come true! With  or without the ER visit!!!!


  1. More victims of the 2015 crud! I'm glad you have been able to help each other deal with it. Keep taking good care of each other, your well being matters.

    1. Thank you so Much Darla! New Meds today- things are slow, but we are holding.

  2. I am so sorry that you guys are not feeling well, the stuff going around is miserable! I am very thankful I have missed it. You both make such a great team together! I hope you have a speedy recovery! I will be leaving here on Thursday , but will be back in 3 weeks , I am looking forward to getting together and catching up. Much love!

    1. Thank you tops- OK this time when you come back - we REALLY have to get together- we keep missing each other!
      Love and safe journeys!

  3. I gotta say it. Women are so much better at being sick.

    1. LOL! You think so huh? LOL! I hope things are well for you Sarah!