I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us" it is available for purchase here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html

Or on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Rest-Us-K-E-Enzweiler/dp/1329062213/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1432825657&sr=1-2&keywords=m%2Fs+for+the+rest+of+us

I am the founder of the Albuquerque Masters Group. We meet once every other month. The group is open to all who wish to explore their Mastery, slavery, or Dominance and submission. Please contact me here or at my email : Bigdykebear@yahoo.com for more information!
The meetings are free to all who wish to attend!

If you are interested in power munches, skills workshops or play parties in the Albuquerque area please contact the 20 year organization of AEL at:


If you are interested in active online community please find:


Group names for the Albuquerque Community Include:

Land Of Enchantment Fetlifers

Albuquerque Kinksters

KinkySpot Clubhouse

Albuquerque Master/slave forum

New Mexico Leather League: Leather/Kink/Fetish and More

Friday, September 30, 2016

Leather Families Part One of Three

Lately I have been having a lot of conversations about leather families. What do they look like? How do you get into one/start one? What does it mean? These are great questions for a tradition that is quickly fading within a vast culture that is more inundated with kink then leather.  As the kink component starts to have a greater and stronger voice in BDSM, some of the leather traditions are being set aside for a new and different way of doing things. 

I am thrilled to see some of these changes; they need to happen to make room for growth and new ideas. But on the other hand, as the things that I have treasured and loved about my leather path become less common, it is sad to see these traditions disappear so quickly. It will soon become one of those things that “used to be.” Like what happened with “Old Guard” leather. 

It is the reality of time that those that lived Old Guard have mostly passed on, and with their loss goes the realities of their traditions. Old Guard was not the beginning of leather. It was however, the beginning of leather in print for the US.  More significantly, it was print about us, told BY us, and made available to us in mass.  We owned those stories, and as what tends to happen, stories became history. Our printed stories became our understood reality.  I am not saying that there isn’t some reality in those stories. What I am saying is that the non-fictional pieces told by those that came before us, where just that: non-fiction.  Which as we all know is different than the real and true lives lived. 

 I know that I am going to get back lash here, as I am not old enough, or gay male enough to know what I am talking about. I concede to all of those things. I am not old enough or gay male. What I can say is that in the gay male BDSM culture how leather is looked at is completely different then how I see it.

To use one of all my time favorite quotes from the movie JFK: Mr. X says “Oh, don't take my word for it, don't believe me. Do your own work, your own thinking.”

Let’s talk current leather families.  As in what is going on in our community right now. 

Leather families are extremely varied. They can have a single head or many heads. They can have a lateral or pyramid structure. Basically any kind of structure that works for the people that forms them.

Here is a simplified diagram of my leather family:


l        ll               l

a       aa             a

You may notice that the primary structure of my family is lateral. That is became we are all equals here. You may also notice that one individuals submissive is not a submissive to the group. IE.

My slave is not my brother’s slave. 

I find this family structure works well for me for multiple reasons. One, it pushes me to learn and grow.  We all challenge each other, my brother’s girl challenges me as much as my brother.

Friday, September 23, 2016


 PAGAN PRIDE at BATTAN PARK  from  9-7pm!



My slave, myself, JD and Wade will  be vending! Please come and see us!

Bataan  park  is located here: 

Nearby major cross streets:

Lomas & Carlisle NE

EVENT details are here:


 To  wet your appetite-  take a look  at my slaves store!


Friday, September 16, 2016


Hello  All!

 I have this great blog sitting on the tip  of my fingers-  but I have been  so  busy I haven't been  able to  write it yet!
It will post for next Friday and it is about leather families, looking at  structure,  understanding complexities,  how to  build one. that sort of thing.

So  until  I post it please enjoy: 

Friday, September 9, 2016

my dream workshop

If I had the opportunity to run my dream workshop.

It would be an M/s weekend.  It would include separate space for Masters and slave with the focus on 24/7 long term relationships.  It would be open to D/s types as well and/or people interested in starting to transition to an M/s house. It would be free or 5$ per person. Open on Friday morning with classes. It would not be “talk at you” classes, it would require people writing in notebooks, thinking, and defining things for themselves. There would be a potluck component and end with a BBQ/ play party on Saturday night. 
8- 9:30: getting the basics down   for 24/7,  long term
How to organize your needs, defining your desires, time management.  With an emphasis on self-discovery and insight. 

Break from 9:30 until 10

10- 11:30:  Taking apart pre conceived constructions of Mastery
Redefining Mastery for the individual. Looking at how social pressure and stereotypes influence us as Masters. Asking the tough questions of “how do we define Mastery within ourselves and our relationships outside of social expectation?”

Lunch from 11:30 until 1:30

1:30- 3: How to train a slave.
How to define your needs and defining the steps to get those needs filled. It would include what to do with failure, understanding manipulation, and how to recognize when it is no longer healthy for the Master. 

 Break until 3:30

3:30- 5: Creating dialogue.
Bringing the Masters and slaves together. It would involve exercises like- they all get asked a question and answer it in their notebooks.  Then choose whether or not to share it with each other. The emphasis would be creating a dialogue on expectations, fears, failures, and understanding.
It would ask the tough questions like “I don’t understand it when you…” and “I expect …”

End at 5


9:00- 11:00: Practice training
The Masters and slaves would come together and they would practice applying the training that was discussed the previous day.  Going through all of the steps with a new skill. 

Break from 11:00- 11:30

11:30- 1:00 Setting up a House
Going through a calendar, looking at daily expectations, and creating a vison for the future of the self and the relationship.

Lunch 1- 3
3:00- 5:00 Discipline
What is it, what does it mean? What is effective and what happens when it fails. 

End at 5

Group dinner at 5:30 and then a play party.

The “s” types would also have classes.  I would get with my slave to see what things would be helpful in dealing with the big issues that weight on “s” types.  And yet allows the groups to come together from time to time.

That would be my dream workshop to run.
At the end there would be no graduates, caps, or patches given out. Just ideas, confidence, and hopefully friendships. 

Huh, cool.

Friday, September 2, 2016

Am I leather?

Am I leather?

What is leather?

What separates leather from kink?

Over the past few weeks I have been asked theses question a lot. I love the conversations that these types of questions create.  What I have seen and experienced over the years is that kink is what people “do” and leather is what people “are”.  Neither one is better than the other. They are just different.   

BDSM is the umbrella, while leather and kink are some of the categories. (Some people consider that the other way around.)  Kink and leather have a lot of similarities, such as power exchange, role play, honorifics, organizing events, and playing a role in community.  But there is a difference, it is more palpable then it is describable. 

Leather folk are more viscerally geared towards knowing history, understanding protocol, showing respect, learning, not only organizing events but organizing sustainable community inclusive oriented events, a lot of their talk is what is right and wrong, what is for the greater good, discretion, and handling problems in a way that creates the least amount of problems possible. Words like honor, integrity, and inclusion are common to them. 

People that are leather do not put down their leather for other parts of their lives, like I see kink people do. People that are leather identify that way because it drives their lives.  The concept is that it finds a place in everything that a leather person does. I.E. Kink may not play a part in one’s day to day job, but leather absolutely does. 

But all of this is just talk really. Being leather is a feeling. Like any other identity. It is an internal, visceral, and personal thing. It has to have meaning to the individual or the words, and the identity, are useless. So a way to look at it is “what would your leather identity drive you to do”? 

If you identify as a submissive that loves to serve. Being a submissive drives the service. Identity into action. If you are leather what does it drive you to do? Learn history? Organize?  Dress or act differently?

Those are all possible. The beauty of leather is that you get to decide that for yourself. How you feel, what you think, what drives you? Those are all parts of answering the big question of “Am I leather”?

Just to clarify here, that does not mean that all leather people are utopia. Quite the opposite, leather folk, like their kink cousins, can absolutely be elitist assholes. More than once I have seen a really amazing person take on a leather identity and then turn into a total shit bag. 

Just a thought.