I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us" it is available for purchase here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html

Or on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Rest-Us-K-E-Enzweiler/dp/1329062213/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1432825657&sr=1-2&keywords=m%2Fs+for+the+rest+of+us

I am the founder of the Albuquerque Masters Group. We meet once every other month. The group is open to all who wish to explore their Mastery, slavery, or Dominance and submission. Please contact me here or at my email : Bigdykebear@yahoo.com for more information!
The meetings are free to all who wish to attend!

If you are interested in power munches, skills workshops or play parties in the Albuquerque area please contact the 20 year organization of AEL at:


If you are interested in active online community please find:


Group names for the Albuquerque Community Include:

Land Of Enchantment Fetlifers

Albuquerque Kinksters

KinkySpot Clubhouse

Albuquerque Master/slave forum

New Mexico Leather League: Leather/Kink/Fetish and More

Friday, June 29, 2012

SSC, RACK, PRICK, suck my........

A few weeks back my amazing slave did a presentation at PERV.  She was brilliant, and I will be posting her notes for those that missed her speak!  That aside,  the first hour of PERV the leaders go over rules, concepts, and social graces that new people need to know, it is like a quickie 101 class that covers the basics. 

Something that they cover are the concepts of SSC, RACK, and PRICK.  Which are acronyms that have been used in the community for years to co notate safety and what makes BDSM, fetish and kink separate from abuse.

SSC is the oldest term. It means safe, sane and consensual.
People that disagreed with SSC came up with RACK which means risk aware consensual kink.         
People that disagreed with that came up with PRICK which means personal responsibility, informed consensual kink.

Really people?

So here are my thoughts…..

First off PRICK is misogynistic, and non inclusive. What about having an acronym for safety not based on male genitalia?  How about CLIT? I also strongly believe that a person can’t always be informed. How can you be informed about how you will respond as a top or a bottom to a new type of play that you have never done before? You may be informed on the technique- but the emotional response takes on a life of its own.  How can you be personally aware of a disease process that you have if it  hasn’t manifested itself? And avoid those certain types of play that are dangerous to do? (For example- a person with a fluid restriction or congestive heart failure, or high  blood pressure should not do saline injections. Breath play and reactive airway disease --RAD-     can be deadly, and genital cutting and diabetes are a potentially castrating mix.)  Also the use of the term Kink is extremely exclusive.  Many of us don’t view what we do as kink, or kinky.  There are many that are strictly fetishist.

I know that this is a technicality of terms here - but the word kink just doesn’t cover the very broad range of who we are and what we do.   

Leather isn’t my kink- it is who I am, and who my slave is.

Then there is RACK. I go back to my previous points; first off awareness of something a person has never done before is a fallacy.  Just because a person is aware of the possible physical tolls, does not mean that they are aware of the emotional ones.  It also does not mean that what their bodies once accepted, they can continue to accept. Being aware of the risks assumes that you know your own risk. And that is not always possible.  Again with the use of the word kink – that does not include a massive amount of people   in the community.  

Personally I like SSC. I know that the argument initially was that what we do is not safe, and definitely not sane.  I beg to differ.  

What we do is safe within what we know at this time. What I mean by that is--- new information about play is coming out all of the time. Our safety is based in what we know now, and that may be different then what we know five years from now. Twenty years ago it was considered safe to tie someone up by their wrists, we (as in the community) know more about joints and nerves now. Ten years ago cutting was done with betadine-  now we know that betadine slows healing, so alcohol is sometimes the better choice. For that matter-  the use of gloves did not come into fashion until just recently.....

As far as emotional safety we go off of our own desire and our past experiences. Although we may misjudge our responses at that time it does not mean that we are less responsible, or less informed.  It just means that we strove for safety, and may have fell short.

As far as sane. If what we do is not sane, then does that mean it is insane? What is more sane the recognizing who you are and then doing something about it? What is more sane the negotiating pleasure and seeking others that fit your desires? There is no negotiation with insanity, no reason, no aftercare, no red-ing out. 

Insanity is about disconnection for reality- play is about the deepest connection to the reality that we have.

So in my opinion I say we return to SSC. It is easy to remember, inclusive, and general enough to keep people talking. And that is what it was supposed to do, keep people talking and thinking about what we are doing.

Rant over……

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