I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us" it is available for purchase here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html
Or on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Rest-Us-K-E-Enzweiler/dp/1329062213/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1432825657&sr=1-2&keywords=m%2Fs+for+the+rest+of+us
I am the founder of the Albuquerque Masters Group. We meet once every other month. The group is open to all who wish to explore their Mastery, slavery, or Dominance and submission. Please contact me here or at my email : Bigdykebear@yahoo.com for more information! The meetings are free to all who wish to attend!
If you are interested in power munches, skills workshops or play parties in the Albuquerque area please contact the 20 year organization of AEL at:
If you are interested in active online community please find:
Group names for the Albuquerque Community Include:
Land Of Enchantment Fetlifers
Albuquerque Master/slave forum
New Mexico Leather League: Leather/Kink/Fetish and More
Friday, July 4, 2014
It all starts from "just one thing"
So this week I picked a day to be “the day”. The plan was to go into the barn and just move one thing into a more permanent spot or throw one thing out, that sort of thing. This was my new emotional growth plan of- just one thing. It wasn’t about moving the stuff- it was about getting past my emotional block and starting to heal and reclaim my space.
At out last house, my barn was meticulously clean. It was my pride to have it be accessible, well kept, organized, and user friendly. Everything had a place, was easy to find and within a quick reach. The hay hooks, scissors, and wire cutters all hung in between the door and the hay, the halters were hung beside the front door for easy grabbing, the brushes and the emergency kit where on the table so that there were a quick reach and go.
When we moved in here the barn became the unwitting recipient of my anxiety. So it is a mess- literally, it s kind of a death trap. I have hay all over; my stuff is where it landed when we moved in. I can barely walk around in there, and I can’t walk without tripping or having something wrap around my foot. It is well- embarrassing. And forget getting to any usable tack, or knowing where to find something.
So I decided that I was going to do ‘just one thing”. It was my plan to help deal with my anxiety and get my new barn up and running, get my pride back so to speak. The intent is that over time it should less scary, more do able, less emotionally intimidating, and I get a clean, usable barn. Good plan right. RIGHT???
So I took a deep breath, fed the horses and then went in for my one thing. I knew what one thing I wanted to move, I was nervous and all fluttery and I picked up the shovel- not my one thing- but was in the way of my one thing.
When I heard it.
Then I saw it.
Then I backed up a little and ran for my camera.
When I burst into the house my slave rightfully so- anxiously said “Punkin- what are you doing?” I think it was my answer of “Nothing….” That caused concern and raised the slave alarms.
I was able to get one good picture but in the rest my hands were shaking because my slave was alarmed and yelling at me in the background. Lovingly, but yelling.
It is a beautiful thing to have chosen family in the herpetological society. It was a snake, and I wanted to know how much danger I was in by having it live in my barn. Luckily they were able to tell me that it was a bull snake, and that bull snakes do all sorts of good things. They eat mice, are non aggressive and not at all dangerous. They even gave me tips on how to make him feel comfortable in the barn, and how to alert him that I was on my way. It turns out that snakes can’t hear, but they can feel vibrations, so they told me to knock before I go into the barn to announce that I am coming in.
The next day I went back in, I looked around, took a deep breath and then- I moved that one thing.
Then when I went back in that night to feed, I did it again. Now I have a whole bunch of things moved and in their place. Before I knew it I had a whole area cleared out. A WHOLE AREA!
In a spiritual sense the snake represents the Loa, Damballa. Spiritually I feel as if Damballa has freed me from what was holding me back. Given me strength, made me feel protected and safe so that I could go in there. I could take that next step.
I have struggled with this for a whole year. Now I am slowly reclaiming that part of me back. It feels good. It feels freeing, it feels loving and it feels like I am once again making my way home.
So what is your “one thing?” What are your emotional goals for your life that all start with doing just “one thing?” And where will it lead you?
I am going out to feed now.
And to move my one thing for today.
It is a good day.