I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us" it is available for purchase here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html

Or on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Rest-Us-K-E-Enzweiler/dp/1329062213/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1432825657&sr=1-2&keywords=m%2Fs+for+the+rest+of+us

I am the founder of the Albuquerque Masters Group. We meet once every other month. The group is open to all who wish to explore their Mastery, slavery, or Dominance and submission. Please contact me here or at my email : Bigdykebear@yahoo.com for more information!
The meetings are free to all who wish to attend!

If you are interested in power munches, skills workshops or play parties in the Albuquerque area please contact the 20 year organization of AEL at:


If you are interested in active online community please find:


Group names for the Albuquerque Community Include:

Land Of Enchantment Fetlifers

Albuquerque Kinksters

KinkySpot Clubhouse

Albuquerque Master/slave forum

New Mexico Leather League: Leather/Kink/Fetish and More

Friday, October 4, 2013

Bad day- but not that day

So  we are having a rough time. Financially we are still struggling and it doesn't take much  to  rock  our boat. I know that logistically it will be a year, I know this in  my head. And then  something happened.

We got  in a lot of money, for us. I got a great paycheck and my student loan  came in, and we paid our bills. That is all we did is pay our bills and get some propane. It allowed us to get a little caught up, and then  even though  we watched really really close,  we were back  in the negative within  4 days. 
Get this-  it wasn't even  our fault!  Has anyone ever had it happen where you pay a bill, and it shows on your statement, then it goes away and comes out later -  so you think that you have paid the bill  and still  have money left over, when  in reality it went into  limbo and needs to  be paid still?  That is what happened....

This was terrifying- everything hitting all over again- the amount of panic hit so  hard it knocked the breath out of both of us. The snowball  affect pulled the safety rug right out from under is, and we started scrambling. Right now we are just hoping to  get enough  together in the month of October to   make our house payment. 
Currently I am looking for a second job, and depending, I am  may have to  quit school.  I am  slowly  coming to peace with this. I cry  a lot. It hurts, but saving this house needs to be what matters. School can  wait.

Then  something else happened-

We were driving home from  Alb to  Edgewood  and there was a man in the highway flagging people  to move out of the lane closest to the edge of the road. We moved over and looked at what had happened.  His truck  was in  flames. We could feel the heat from the fire from  inside our car as the flames on the white truck  came up from under the hood, up  over his tires, and continued up onto the windshield. The panic was all over his face as his truck sat helpless on the side of the road attached to  an even bigger white trailer.

My slave and I looked at each other and  even though we were in  a very bad place-   we weren't  having his day.

Maybe he was on  his last dime and that was all of his possessions in his trailer.
Maybe he had just moved to  NM  for a fresh  start and this was as good  as it was getting for him.
Maybe he was on the job and let his insurance lapse just until he got paid  and he was hauling  someone else s stuff that he was going to have to replace. 
Maybe  he was at the end of his rope, and this was just another thing in a long line of things.

So many maybes....

So as my slave and I sat together that morning at 4 am  staring at out negative bank  account trying to breath-  we both  said to  each  other-  we are struggling-  but we aren't having that day.
Not today.

It is my hope that this man is safe and that his loved ones are safe, and that he made it out intact and with some feelings of a light at the end of his very dark tunnel.
It is my hope that he has those that love him and support  him and see him through.

I am  grateful, not for his misfortune, but for the reminder that we are struggling and probably will for a while,  and even though we are having a bad day-  it is not that day.

Thank the Spirits, the Gods and Goddesses that watch over us-  it is not that day.


  1. I remind myself everyday to be patient and to be grateful for the good things and for the blessings. It is so hard to look forward when right now is so hard. Thinking of you and sending you peace and strength.

  2. Thank you so much, I really appreciate your thoughts and energy.